It's raining. It has been most of the weekend.
It's one of those effects you don't expect - for the rain to make you sad after the loss of a loved one. It makes perfect sense in hindsight.
I love the rain. But now, for now, it makes me kind of sulky.
I'm staying inside today. Thinking about Susan and about the plans we might have made on a weekend like this.
Yesterday I made the impromptu decision to take Dominic to the antique shop because I knew Jeff was helping Mom and Dad. While there, Jeff mentioned a vinyl store in Ocala called Vinyl Oasis that was having a massive overstock sale - CDs, cassettes, and vinyl for $0.50. He had never been there before and obviously neither had I.
I helped Jeff wrap up with Mom and Dad, and they offered to keep Dominic for awhile, so Jeff and I could check out the sale.
We were sitting on the floor of the store, doing the hunt for treasures when it occurred to me - this isn't something I've ever done with Jeff. This is something he would have taken Susan to do.
And suddenly, there making new memories with Jeff, I felt sad and out of place. This should have been Susan.
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