sex and guns.

This is my default picture on Myspace currently. And it's getting some mixed reviews; although most people find it sharp and powerful.

One of my good writing friends *(Jessica) left a comment regarding how she never pegged me for a guns type of person.

I can see how that would be the common perception, what with my typical 'peace, love and compassion' persona. However, things are never that cut and dry, especially when it comes to me ... you know this.

I'm not claiming to be a pro-gun person, or an NRA freak. But -- surprise, surprise -- I do have an opinion.

I view guns control the same way I view sex ed. That's right, I said it.

Just because the "adults" ignore a topic -- an elephant in the room, even -- doesn't mean it's not blaring it's trumpet nose right into your ears, singing 'try me, try me.' So, in case you're wondering, no I don't believe in teaching abstinence.

Just like they portray the angel and devil on the cartoon character's shoulders - teasing and tempting him, just like you were tempted to peep into your parents' closet for presents at Christmas time as a child, and just like I am tempted to thoroughly know any person who actively avoids offering me that opportunity, ignoring sex and ignoring guns is the quickest, straightest route to detriment, poor judgment, ignorance, and potentially death. What you're not supposed to know, to touch, to experience, you just absolutely MUST know, touch, and experience. This is simply human nature. The 'see for yourself' quandary.

If the adults taught the dangers of both sex and guns, perhaps not go so far as to use scare tactics, but do be blatantly honest, maybe there'd be less teen pregnancy, STD outbreaks, and less arbitrary gun-related deaths.

If parents say, "look, if you have sex, you'll get the clap and then you'll never get your happily ever after..." kids say, "hey eff you. You don't know jack and I'm going to do the exact opposite of what you say because you're my stupid, stuffy mother."

But if parents said, "hey, you're growing up. Sometimes sex happens. Here's how to be safe about it. It's NOT a taboo subject so if you have questions, ask me. I made you so I must know a bit about it... I'd rather you ask questions and be safe, than not ask out of embarrassment and get the clap, okay?"

That's how I'm handling it when I have children. verbatim actually.

As for guns, the same sort of applies. I grew up in a gun-wielding home. They were locked in a cabinet in my parents' bedroom, ammunition locked in a separate compartment (a compartment I couldn't even reach until I was about 17-years-old). As a child I might not have gotten to hold them, but I knew they were there.

My parents kept guns in the house and I turned out just fine -- as did my sister and my brother. There were no secrets. And without the shadows of secrets, the mystery of the metal killing cannons disappeared. Guns weren't a curious creation to me because I knew what they were and what they were used for. My dad was a hunter. Guns provided us food.

My parents gave us kids BB guns for fun. And yes, my brother and sister shot me in the ass (actually just the back of the upper leg as I was running away). It hurt. It hurt so much I remember thinking, "man, I might be dying." Dead from an ass wound (one with a sting comparable to that of a swift hit from a paddle) isn't really that realistic, but as a child, the insta-welt seemed potentially fatal.

My point is, growing up I was taught what a gun was for and I never felt overcome with curiosity towards them. They were there. I knew they were there. And in the case of an emergency, I would be capable of handling one.

And the day the need came to get the single pump, single barrel shotgun out of the cabinet and fire a practice round or two into a stump on our property, I handled it well. The fact of the matter is, guns should never be left loaded.

Never leave them loaded. This way, unbridled rage is never an excuse for firing a gun. If it's not loaded, or easily able to be loaded, there's no chance you'll fire a gun without actively thinking about it first.

But teaching about guns alone is not enough. You can't let you child go into tamtrums and tyrades over things like not getting dessert before dinner, fight in school and join gangs and then expect them not to snatch a gun in a fit of fury the first time they argue with their brother while playing cards.

Teaching about guns starts with teaching your child patience, level-headedness, zen, and mostly the use of words over weapons. This is paramount. PARAMOUNT.

The bottom line is: not teaching your children about guns is almost as bad as putting one in their hands and saying, "here, hold this. And when I turn my back, go ahead and experiment ... see what it can do."

In this world, sooner or later your child will come across a gun or a situation that involves one. You have to ask yourself, do you want them to know exactly how to handle that situation or do you want them to be scared stiff by the sight of it and behave eratically or inappropriately?

In my opinion, the risk is too great to not teach them about guns and gun safety.